I am a new person.

It’s been almost a month since I completed the PHP program and I can proudly say I can see the benefit of it and am so happy to have gone through it. I am still continuing to take my medicine and I’m committed to them through the winter - the hardest time for my depression and anxiety.

I feel amazing. I have been working at MRM for about 3-4 days a week. Today was the first day I was there for an entire shift. It felt great smiling and getting to know new customers. I remembered how much I enjoy the customer interaction and learning about everyone. One of our missions is to create a community where it feels like you are an old family friend and you know what, we are succeeding because of me. It feels good to brag a little. 😉

I am still struggling with my want to be holistic vs. rx free and maintaining a healthy regime. I have completed 2-3 workouts/long walks and feel good in my body but still can’t get motivated to work out. I will keep trying and making it a priority these next few weeks.

But I am struggling with this. I always try to do holistic methods for pain - acupuncture, chiropractic care, essential oils, self care- manicures and pedicures, eat organic and choose bottled water. After those don’t work I usually wind up back on medicine. Taking medicine every day worries me. If I want to have another child I would need to be off one or more during the first trimester and the weeks trying to conceive. I was holistic with Rowan’s pregnancy and had severe anxiety. With Luca’s pregnancy I took Zoloft thoughout and felt great. I was so worried I damaged her with the medicine, and guess what, she’s thriving! But this medicine is different.

So holistic or prescriptions meds?

Random other struggles that I would LOVE advice on is the following:

Do I get a job for extra family cash or give my all to MRM?

Do I need to continue providing organic fruits and vegetables and most of our groceries for my family or can I risk buying products with processed foods and additives? I have learned so much on organic practices and conventional methods over the years and try my hardest to avoid toxins and pesticides that are in our foods. I follow the dirty dozen and can proudly say both Luca and Rowan eat primarily organic foods. If you didn’t know I’m a germaphobe that fears contamination. (I’ll get into that someday…)

Do we continue recycling or should we start composting?

Do we need to continue recycling? I have heard that it takes just as much gas and fuel to recycle as it does trashing things.

These are my current worries and I am so grateful I have been able to think clearly and enjoy my life.

It always gets better.

Please let me know your thoughts below, I love opening up and hearing new viewpoints. XOXO D